Football intrudes in my life again

April 9th 2008

So I got home to my humble flat yeah after being round at Alisha's to see her new bag which is very very expensive and chicly smart and from Anya Hindmarch grr spit.

And the first thing I saw right was the TV on with a replay of someone in a red shirt that even I know is Stevie Gerrard doing a celebration yeah and my heart sank because for those of you who aren't aware my boyfriend Karl is both a football anorak and an Arsenal supporter.

And I could smell toast.

And there was Karl in the kitchen making lots and lots of toast and with what is known as a face like thunder. So I was like, I thought you were going to watch the match at Paul's house? and he said Paul started crying so he thought he'd better leave.

And I changed the channel yeah but not before I saw the score had been 4-2 to Liverpool and I knew we were in for big trouble because I didn't have much bread in the kitchen and the Sikh shop would be shut. The question was would Karl be upset enough to walk to the Turkish shop which stays open later. Because when Arsenal lose he has to have toast.

Also when they lose he has to come round to mine and can't stay at home in his own place and suffer right because men are like that.

But I am worried because when the fortunes of Arsenal are like in decline then Arsene Wenger gets thinner and thinner and Karl gets fatter and fatter and this is like an imbalance that the world could do without.

But he was too upset to walk anywhere so we had hours of big sulks about the referee and not enough toast and the only marmalade being poncy lime stuff yeah and fond as I am of Karl yeah I was forced to go and look at a lot of shoes on the net while he phoned all his Arsenal supporting mates and swore a lot.

Like I have said many times before yeah football is death to relationships. Though good for the bread industry lol.